Chances

We all deserve 2nd chances...

A chance to love and be loved...
A chance to forgive and ask for forgiveness...

A chance to start a new life...
A chance to make your life better...
A chance to live your life the way GOD wants you to...

A chance to correct your mistakes...
A chance to accept your faults...

A chance to meet someone who will accept you for whoever you are...
who will accept your past, who stands beside you today... and who will still be there for you tommorrow...

Everyone deserves it!

I'm just glad I'm enjoying the best chance of all... A chance to be HAPPY! :)

His and Her Story to tell..

Someday I'll have a story to tell....

Though it's hard to imagine, someday I'll tell my children the story I'm writing with my life today. But that realization does little to save me from the puzzling maze called now. " History never looks like history when you're living through it, It always look confusing and messy, and it always feel uncomfortable," says John Gardner.

I am now in the middle of messiness and confusion. I still have so many questions. Will I know when I'm walking trough my story for first time? Will I have to choose between the person who loves me and the one I love? What matters when I'm already 50 years old? Will time stand still for one moment to tell me that this person-this one person, out of all the billions bustling on the planet-is the one? Will I realize when it happens? Or might i miss it?

Some questions are probably best left unasked. I know I should put them aside and wait for life to unfold it's mysteries. Someday when I'm older and wiser I'll sit back and tell my story to someone who will listen. I'll probably tell some young fool the same things I get so tired of hearing from others " You can't rush these things".

Someday when I'll look back on my story it will definitely bring tears of joy and tears of remorse. It will remind me of God's Goodness. It will be a story of Selfless Love, Faith and Commitment.

Remember, someone, somewhere will read your story and be it a happy story or a story with sadness, it may have as much meaning to the reader, as it has to you.

Many of us lead similar lives, if we can gain experience from each other, our lives hopefully, should be easier.

Now let me share this two stories to you...!

HER Story To Tell...


This is a story about a girl who fell inlove at the age of 11. About her first love, how they meetand how they have been seperated. It happened when I was in elementary, I got a crush on someone named -mack- he was in a
group called "chickboy" It is a group of popular and good -looking boys in the campus. They've
commited to several girls and players of the game called "LOVE".

Unlike my friends who are beautiful I am an ugly duckling back then... But one day, He approached me and said that he likes me,he doesn't have to go through with the whole process of courting because he knows that i like him so much... It was like a dream come true... And someone woke up " It is just a bet "...

Damn! I was hurt...
I cried.. I cried real hard...
They say kids cry because of broken toys... But not me, I was crying because of my "Broken heart"...

I was left broken by the first boy I fell in love with...

Highschool came, I can still see him around the campus, but not the same boy I fell in love with.
We used to bump to each other along the hallway of the school, but it seems that we don't know each other anymore... I graduated highschool, and he was not able to march with us.. Last thing I've heard, He's already in Canada...

Years had passed...

I graduated College in one of the State University in Manila...
One day I was surfing the net checking my "Friendster" account... I received a message from a guy named "Dr. Greenthumb" on the body of the message hewrote " walang kupas ah.. ganda padin". Out of curiosity I Checked his profile and found out that's him...

We exchange messages but it didn't last long since I was in a relationship that time.. After a few months my 3 years relationship ended...

It was early 2009 when "chickboy" organized a reunion for -mack- , he took a 2 months vacation...
We exchange numbers.. The next day he called me up and asked me out..
But I resist... He didn't give up until I say yes...


We decided to meet in the mall nearby... Ate in an italian resto.
He keep on staring at me and that makes me feel really uncomfortable..
I really don’t know what’s wrong with my face..and when i asked him why..
he just smiled and said ” wow! you look so great..you’re so beautiful”
haha.. imagine the boy whom i admire the most way back elementary days is now infront of me
saying that i look beautiful.. i just smiled at him and said “bolero ka pa din”..he nodded and said..
”nah.. bolero ako but i’m not a liar”..

i still have work that day so wejust ate and had a short chitchats about what happened in our
lives for the past years..my college friends texted me and wanna meet up in a coffee shop nearby adriatico so before going to work we decided to drop by.. I introduced him to my friends and after that we took a cab to makati.. he texted me and saying ...
" thank you for the time and he’s really happy to see me after 10years.." my work ends at 2am when i’m about to go home i checked my phone and saw a lot of messages from him.. then the next day i woke up by my phone ring..
it’s him and wants to see me again.. and i said yes.. again we ate in a resto it’s already 4pm so i would be late at my 5pm work if we’ll watched a movie but we did..haha..i came to work at around 9pm and after work we texted all night.. he asked me to give him a chance.. "I am willing to take stairs" - he said

Again those sweet words melt my heart.. right there on that moment i fell inlove again with the boy who gave me my first broken heart... “dati naman di mu siya pinapansin e, ngaun sasabihin mu mahal mu” it was just a joke by an elementary friend but that hits me.. baka nga this was just one of the bets.. i ended up asking myself..

is this for real?
does he really love me? but i love him so i took the risk..
the day that he needs to go back to Vancouver has come..
he left me with a promise “that he’ll come back” he left me with a necklace with a locket,
inside is our picture.. 

Keeping a long distance relationship was hard.. the first three months has been great..
he would call me everyday.. and spent hours on the phone talking about life and our future together..

Then one day..
no emails, no offline messages, no sweet
comments on friendster no phone calls..
i tried to contact him for a lot of times..
i left emails,offline messages, still sweet
comments and voice mails but no respond at all

weeks had passed..

Then one day he called up saying to get rid of him because i would just be hurt and i am just wasting my time loving and waiting for him.. I cried.. really hard..

The “BOY” who’s the reason of my first broken heart is now the ‘MAN’ who left me with a broken heart again.. lost.. and abandoned.. up to this day i am still wearing the necklace he left me..a sign that i’m still inlove with my first
love, my puppy love and still holding on to the promise of forever..

Each of us has a story to tell.. and this is mine..

HIS story to tell..

I just read a blog a while ago about a girl, who thinks she is in-love with the wrong guy. bout how they met way back in their elementary days,how he broke her heart the first time, how they met again after years of not not seeing each other and,again, how he broke her heart for the second time.This story is not the continuation of her’s but rather the half, the missing and the truth behind the story that she have inside her head and she strongly believes.

When I was in elementary, i was in a group called “chickboy” i know it sounds kinda disgusting word to say but it was the best word that 12 yearolds -like me and my friends- could come up with.

Unlike my friends who was commited to severals girls, I only had one, not until I had the courage to tell the girl what i felt for her. After the break up from my very first relationship, I told her -Ms.Mary- everything. . . I kinda knew that she liked me as well so I didn’t had to go through the whole process of courting. She said yes to me, and that made me really happy.

I don’t clearly remember how we broke up, but I am more than sure that I did not cheat on her, and that she was not a bet. i know that it doesn’t matter now, but what I am trying to say is all that she has been believing is not proven, came from hear-says, and therfore is a lie. I already told her this quite a lot of time, but I guess, she will believe at whatever she wants to believe in.

Highschool came, she was more beautiful than she was when we were in elementary, dont get me wrong, she was also beautiful back then, it was just, i guess, she looked and acted more mature. Four years of high school passed, and it seemed that what we had before also passed us by. because in her eyes, I am a guy capable of hurting her heart, and a guy who own not a single heart, or maybe owns one but it was made out of stone, or worse, made out of complete vaccum.

To tell you the truth. Hindi ako Gwapo! Kupal lng. hehe.. there you go, you heard it right. aminado ko na kupal ako at makapal ang muka ko. anyways, i moved out. I moved miles away from the land that i know best.I left everyone that i love and loved.

Then the day came, i saw Ms. mary on friendster (thats why i think friendster is the best,though it has tons of viruses and spams.) she was more gorgeous than ever. Just like the movies, everything about her, came back in my mind in a flash, some memories lost, but thank God, some remained.

I messaged her.She messeged back. At that time she was in a crappy relationship. but still, just like how a good gurl behaves, she tried to avoid messaging me again. I don’t give up easily though, I am a pretty persistent person. so kept sending her messages.

I came back to the Philippines. And while checkin my emails, I got a message from her. I was surprised because she never returned my messages before. But it didnt matter, the only thing i had in my mind was to see her again.

I asked her out, she said no. I asked again, she said no, until she finally gave up turning me down, and agreed to see me.

To be honest, i was more like exited than nervous to her. eventhough i did not know what i would say to her, after all those years. Or what if she was still mad at me or something. It didnt mattered much to me, though. I wanted to see her.

There she was, standing at the corner, one of the most unforgettable women in my life. Right there and then, i told myself, I have to get her back.you know what , maybe i should stop writing about the past. perhaps i should focus more on what we have now, or what is left of what we had before.

Long distance. misunderstandings. longing. sadness. loneliness, where did the rest of us go? i don't know. as the taxi driver said, yung mula sa puso lng po!

love has no limits. it has no measurements. if you love someone, please dont tell then that you love them more, or they love you less. because if you really love someone, the only thing that matters is love, not the numbers, not the size, not the amount….

We let our emotions, take total control of us. each emotion requires action, when youre happy you smile, when you sad you cry. and the worse is, we are not together to share al those emotions. i couldn't give her a hug even if i want to. i couldnt kiss her even if i am dyng to do so. imagine how hard it is for us, don't worry bout me, im cool with suffering, but her? she had enough i think. her story was far way complicated than what she wrote in her blogs, and that is why I feel guilty.

Guilty for what? i am not cheating on her, i feel guilty because i am not as strong as the man that she thinks i am.

A simple message is good enough, that's what she always say. but cmon, were not kids anymore. you know that it is not enough.

We both entered this, and i am hoping that if ever, you want to exit, please, consider that you would leave me inside. i would stay here inside this. whatever we have. its all good..id stay committed to the promise that i would go back.

And if ever. i hope this wouldn't happen,you find someone else. i know it would be my turn to wait. . .

Now, i am not asking you to hold on, or wait or anything. the only thing that i ask of you now, is that please never forget.. na babalikan kita kasi mahal na mahal kita…

I love You Babe!

There would be times that you might feel that I don't love you anymore...

But those are the times I'm loving you more..

There would be times that you might feel that I don't miss you..

But those are the times that I'm missing you so bad...

There would be times that you might feel that I don't need you..

But those are the times that you are the air the keeps me breathing...

There would be times that I wouldn't have the time to text, to call or even to see you because of my busy sched... But those are the times that you are always on my mind..

There are times that you might feel that I'm having second thought... And I'm sorry.. I shouldn't have looked back...
Thank you for making me believe in love again...

 

I love you! I love you so much Babe.. muah!

Growing Up

I guess when it comes down to it being grown up isn't half as fun as growing up.

These are the best days of our lives.

The only thing that matters is just following your heart

And eventually you'll finally get it right.- The Ataris

I wish I was a little kid again when all I wanted for my birthday was cupcakes for my entire class & for everyone to sing happy birthday to me.. and money never mattered..

Sometimes I wish I could go back to the days when I was six and my biggest

problem was what kind of dress to put on my Barbie's or whether or not I had enough Lego's to build a fort.

But as i Grow up and realized that I'm no longer the immature little girl there's a lot of things that i realized..

I realized that Parties is no longer my life...

Signature bags and shoes is no longer a necessity...

Being famous and pretty is no longer my priority...

As we grow up, we learn that even the one person that wasn't supposed to ever let you down probably will. You will have your heart broken probably more than once and it's harder every time. You'll break hearts too, so remember how it felt when yours was broken. You'll fight with your best friend. You'll blame a new love for things an old one did. You'll cry because time is passing too fast, and you'll eventually lose someone you love. So take too many pictures, laugh too much, and love like you've never been hurt because every sixty seconds you spend upset is a minute of happiness you'll never get back.

It's hard to accept, but you can't change the past. You can't go back and manipulate things to the way you wanted them to happen. Because life’s be meaningless and boring and just not worth living. But you can change the future and that's a beautiful thing about life. Yes, you will make mistakes. And yes, you will have bad days - but as long as you let the past go, you'll have such a gorgeous and bright future ahead of you. Knowing that things were meant to happen. Knowing that each day you will learn something so that you keep growing to be a better person.

Growing up sucks. Not all kisses are magic, and most boys do not live up to your expectations, but there are those times when everything, I mean love, romance, relationships, it all falls together perfectly and it's incredible. It's those moments, no matter how depressingly few and far between, that make growing up worth it

"I’m not a little girl anymore I’ve learned who to trust & who to ignore "

No Goodbyes MSDE!

“The best things in life come in threes, like friends, dreams, and memories.”

We've had some laughs, We've had some tears, and now it's time to say goodbye to a workplace that has become a COMMUNITY. The time has come to say goodbye to everyone that has made me smile over the last few months.

I would just like to say that there have been many great people in MSDE, both past and present, that have made the job truly enjoyable. This resulted in laughter and practical jokes that makes each one of us smile and laugh when we remembered those crazy and stupid stuffs! The "Lady Gaga" at a time when we are all burned out doing thousands of cases. The life at Top Grill,Kuagos,Trellis,Andoks (at lahat ng inuman na dinayo natin!) with Mark Perry, Frieda, Gani and Kavita as evidence most of us are drunk when ONDOY hit Phil. haha! The weekly 2 botts after shift and team breakfast and late dinners everywhere.Those are priceless!Those were Special!

We feel that we have been through all of the highs and lows together from headaches to brain tumours yet we want to come back to work to spend time with a group of friends.It is rare to actually discover something new, and I am proud to be in the team that discovered that "work can be fun!".

I will Miss each one of you!

I would like to give Mommy Len a salute for picking the right people for MSDE and it turned into a real family. For being everyone's Mom I thank you!

To Roy, Thank you for being a friend.. for being our Uncle (though I know it irritates you when we're calling you that way! :P) for being there when Ondoy happened, that was scary but that was the start of our friendship and up to my last week in MSDE you never stop being a friend.. :)

To Richie, remember you will always be one of the reason why i was able to move on... if not for those advices that you've given i will be stuck being miserable! (di man lang ako nakahawak sa bagong motor mo hehe)

To Richard, My partner in crime for many years... since PS days up to IGP you never get tired of me... you've been there on the roughest part of my life and you cried,laughed and get drunk with me! You've proven that distance would never stop us being friends..thank you Mr. Richard! :)

To Ate Baby, Thank you for being my Big sister... for taking good care of me, for teaching me how to cross the streets in Bonifacio! haha.. for your patience and for the friendship... I know how strong you are and always keep that faith! I will miss you.. muah!

To Chuchai.. i will miss our agua bendita moments.. txt txt padin.. You are the people I've enjoyed seeing every day!...

Chesca, I will always remember the 50php packed lunch.. hehe!

Honey, you're super loud voice will surely be missed! (super loud kahit whisper rinig ng buong dept. haha)

Rex, fashion show, Music, Mottos in Life, Beauty Contest will always remind me of you...

Ryan, down to 1! you only have 1 angels left... Thank you for your kindness. And always keep that principle! :)

Jade, "it's killing the feelin" haha.. I will miss our chickahans, the girl talks! but promised me... comments parin sa fb! haha :)

Sherwin, sorry I was not able to make a note for you sa whiteboard kasi I am not sure where's you station eh.. :) well, anyways,, magbago ka na! haha nka-auto debit ka na... :P

Daddy Jim, always remember do's and dont's! bawal ang pork,,bawal ang beans,, haha! at wag masyadong nire-rest ang eyes,, nadadala ka ni bro eh :)

Daddy Oli, may haliparot na kumpare! hehe.. sad, we have to part ways pero sbi mo nga.. bisyo na to!

Mon, thank you sa laging paghatid samin ni ate baby.. hehe! and wag ka na lagi ma-confused! :P

Ashley, haha! i so love your hair! :) this is your 2nd chance so make it right! wag ka ng pasaway! :)

Kcolet.. Congrats! always keep your feet on the ground.. :)

To Rence, well lagi naman tayong ngchi-chikahan alam mo ng mami-miss kita ng super! hehe..

I will surely miss you all! MSDE will not be MSDE without the 3 people that made it's history... TM LEO, Mommy Len and Florence... you did a great a job!

I am not sure what the future will bring but I am sure that each one of you has been part of my life and will always be part of it! Like has been said before, it has been a pleasure to work in MSDE, but more than that - it has been the privilege to have met and mixed people like all of you!

I have enjoyed my time working with all of you and I will miss all that MSDE presents. Even though I am moving to new account we will always have our memories of MSDE.

I hope that everyone achieves what will make them happy. I am sure reunions and catch-ups will, if not often, be full of laughs

No Goodbyes MSDE.. I'll see you around in IGP! muah! *wink*

and good times.. So How do I say Goodbye to all Of you?..

Some good things never lasts

"There are things we didn’t want to happen but have to experience, things that we don’t want to know but have learned and people who we can’t live without but have to let go, sad but true "

For the past 8 months you are not just a Superior or a Boss...
You've been everyone's friend...
Someone who will laugh with us, who will make bullies with us...
Someone we can share our secrets and confide with...
You've seen me laughing so hard.. and crying to death...
And You never stop being a friend...
You never stop being a boss...
Inspite of our salary disputes and thousands of pending cases!
(it all started there!)
You are the one who fought for us even if it means .....
you know what i mean..

It has really been pleasure working with you...
Your unique personality contrasted nicely with the hardcore job that you did. Who's gonna fill that role? haha! :D When things get kluge, you get it done, even if you are fuzzy :P

I don't know what MSDE will do without you!

As I've said no Goodbyes Rence...
so take your pick from some of these cheesy sayings: live long and prosper, happy trails, peace out, rock on, may the force be with you..

*darn ngpa-kulot pa ko ng hair.. excited pa nman akong ipakita sayo.. ng-leave lang ako! hindi ka manlang nghintay na makita kami!!!!!! ang daya mo!!!!*

Thank You Dad! Till we meet again.

It was August 26, 2007. I am walking down the hospital hallway Fighting against the tears. Only an hour ago, I had been told my father is dying. And only an hour ago, My life came to a screeching halt. Somehow, my hair isn’t a priority Make-up doesn’t even cross my mind. I just feel a raging, overwhelming need to be with my Dad. Years had passed... But still, Thinking of him brings tears to my eyes It was so hard to believe That you were gone. Once so strong; Why did you have to leave? Why did you have to go? Daddy, you put me through college You did that by working with your hands You built big houses and painted tall walls Times were tough that I knew You did what you could, to help me through. You could fixed anything you laid your hands on There wasn’t a thing you couldn’t do With a little cement or some glue Just thinking about this, is making me blue Dad, our sadness knows no end; We can’t believe you’re gone; We’re grieving for you every day; It’s hard to carry on. You may have thought I didn't see, Or that I hadn't heard, Life lessons that you taught to me, But I got every word. Perhaps you thought I missed it all, And that we'd grow apart, But Dad, I picked up everything, It's written on my heart. I’m so sorry for all I put you through I Love you Daddy More than words can describe I wish you were here, I wish you were alive! Happy Father's Day!